USS Enterprise vs. Star Destroyer!
A very old argument Trekkies try to win through the power of trivia. I am such a Trekkie...
FACT: Star Destroyers are equipped with lasers.
FACT: "The Outrageous Okona" states that lasers cannot punch through the Enterprise's shields.
FTW: Duh.
The above mash-up is more generous, but comes to the same conclusion.
Showing posts with label Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction. Show all posts
Monday, November 16, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction #2
Kirk vs. Picard!
Remember the great debate of the early 90s? I recently found papers in which *I* participated in it, clearly on Picard's side at the time, against material sent me (but not written) by my Comments section's very own Doctor Mi!
Excerpts in favor of Kirk
Kirk has more dates than his fitst officer.
Kirk looks good in a ripped shirt. [Obviously before First Contact]
Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
Kirk's first officer doesn't play a wimpy instrument like the trombone.
Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily.
When Kirk doesn't trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard doesn't trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
Three Words: Flying Leg Kick.
Excerpts in favor of Picard (all original material, folks... or at least, "original")
Picard's girlfriends are good-looking even without soft light.
Patrick Stewart is a sex symbol DESPITE his appearance.
103 more episodes
Picard's first officer doesn't play a wimpy instrument like the harp.
Kirk makes a good Nazi.
Picard's body was never taken over by a woman.
Picard has over 1000 people under his command; Kirk a measly 400.
So it's Picard FTW!!!
Wait, what's this? New evidence has come to light?
TWIST!!!
A complete re-evaluation is in the offing!
Remember the great debate of the early 90s? I recently found papers in which *I* participated in it, clearly on Picard's side at the time, against material sent me (but not written) by my Comments section's very own Doctor Mi!Excerpts in favor of Kirk
Kirk has more dates than his fitst officer.
Kirk looks good in a ripped shirt. [Obviously before First Contact]
Diplomacy for Kirk is a phaser and a smirk.
Kirk's first officer doesn't play a wimpy instrument like the trombone.
Kirk can infiltrate Gangsters, Nazis, and even the Pentagon -- easily.
When Kirk doesn't trust the Romulans, he fires at them. When Picard doesn't trust the Romulans, he gets fired at.
Three Words: Flying Leg Kick.
Excerpts in favor of Picard (all original material, folks... or at least, "original")
Picard's girlfriends are good-looking even without soft light.
Patrick Stewart is a sex symbol DESPITE his appearance.
103 more episodes
Picard's first officer doesn't play a wimpy instrument like the harp.
Kirk makes a good Nazi.
Picard's body was never taken over by a woman.
Picard has over 1000 people under his command; Kirk a measly 400.
So it's Picard FTW!!!
Wait, what's this? New evidence has come to light?
TWIST!!!
A complete re-evaluation is in the offing!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Great Match-Ups of Science Fiction #1
Saltshakers versus Fabergé Eggs!
Sorry, I mean Daleks vs Mechanoids!
Daleks... exterminate!
Daleks... are more than robots. They also have little cephalopods inside.
Daleks... make good plumbers.
Mechanoids... uhm...
Mechanoids... ahh... hold on, I'll come up with something...
Mechanoids... nope, almost had it though.
Daleks FTW!
Sorry, I mean Daleks vs Mechanoids!Daleks... exterminate!
Daleks... are more than robots. They also have little cephalopods inside.
Daleks... make good plumbers.
Mechanoids... uhm...
Mechanoids... ahh... hold on, I'll come up with something...
Mechanoids... nope, almost had it though.
Daleks FTW!
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