This Week in Geek (14-20/11/11)

Buys

DVDs this week include Doctor Who's Colony in Space, Red vs. Blue Season 9, Community Season 1, and three Soderbergh films, Out of Sight, The Informant! and The Good German. After years of bumming off one roommate or another's Xbox, I got my own. They make them slin, whisper quiet and Wi-Fi these days, so I'm impressed. Also, have to get my GTA achievements all over again.

"Accomplishments"

DVDs: I'd never seen Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid before this week and boy, was I missing out. It's the complete package. Funny, exciting, thrilling and redolent with meaning, with a startling use of musical sequences and the most charismatic actors of their day. It made a star of Robert Redford, and Paul Newman is at the top of his game too. This ultimate collector's edition has loads of making of material, a mix of vintage, 1994 and 2006 interviews, lots of behind the scenes footage, and 2 commentary tracks. Some redundancies are to be expected, but by putting the focus on different aspects, from production to history, for example, that's mostly avoided. Each featurette has something new to offer. You'll also find the deleted scene (sans audio) with Butch and the Kid seeing themselves die in a movie, production notes and a few bits more.

Rewatched Captain America - The First Avenger as well, and it remains a cool Weird War II movie, something I hope isn't lost in an eventual sequel. It would be a shame to lose the WWII characters - Tommy Lee Jones as Colonel Phillips, Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter, and the Howling Commandos - so I'd hope any future Cap project would at least feature flashbacks to the War. If the commentary track wasn't kidding, such a story might also include the Winter Soldier, since Bucky had been experimented on by Hydra before his untimely fall. That commentary is a lot of fun, but limited like the rest of the extras which amount (on this edition anyway) to a short making of focused on creating Cap's look. I thought they'd used face replacement to create sickly Steve Rogers, but it's actually a body-shrinking CGI process. I'd like to have known more. What's there is fine, it just doesn't answer every question. There's also a different Avengers trailer from the one at the end of the movie.

Does it show? I'm trying to get through my unflipped movie shelf alphabetically. Carrie is next, a film that remains possibly my favorite horror film of all time, though I'll admit to not being a horror fan. Even so, the 70s are definitely my favorite era for the genre. They knew how to create a disturbing atmosphere in those days, which works for me a lot better than disgusting gore or leap-out-of-the-dark frights. Plus, Carrie is ABOUT something. It's about the anxieties of growing up and discovering one's sexuality, and Brian Da Palma does a lot with the theme. And what about that cast? Sissy Spacek's creepy Carrie is supported by the awesome Piper Laurie (strange to see how charming she is in interviews, when I mostly know her for strange roles), John Travolta, Robocop's partner, Sloane's wife and the Greatest American Hero! Most in their first major appearance. The DVD extras deliver too. The making of documentary is split into two 40-minute segments, one on the actors and the other on the production (all the alumni participate except Travolta), there's a shorter bit on the Carrie musical (but alas no sound or video), a photo gallery and production notes on the Stephen King's writing of the novel and its translation into film.

Our Kung Fu Friday selection was Yuen Woo Ping's True Legend, the story of Beggar Su who, according to Chinese folklore, invented drunken boxing. It's a highly entertaining picture, though a flawed one. It has an odd structure, for one, with a climactic battle between Su (played by the excellent Vincent Zhao) and his venomous half-brother (Andy On with super-powers handed to him through the Dark Side of the Force) bringing the intrigue to a close with more than a half-hour to spare. The last act, in which Beggar Su creates the drunken style and defeats killer Western wrestlers seems tacked on by comparison. Yuen Woo Ping goes too heavy on the special effects (the cartoonish snakes and eagles are particularly dated) and dabbles in anachronism (the drunken style is rather close to break dancing here). However, the fights are entertaining and varied (and there are a LOT of them), Zhou Xun as Su's wife is beautiful, strong ans sensitive, and there are some fun cameos to look out for from kung fu superstars Gordon Liu, Michelle Yeoh and David Carradine (sadly, neither of them are involved in a fight). The DVD includes short featurettes one various topics that amount to a fair making of, a couple of storyboard-to-scene sequences, and a related music video.

Books: I just read Whedonistas!, a collection of women's essays and thematic sequel to Chicks Dig Time Lords. Instead of Doctor Who, the subject is Buffy, Firefly, Angel, Dr. Horrible and Dollhouse, more or less in that order of importance. Generally, I like the essays that analyze some aspect of the shows more than I do the personal recollections of how certain writers got into fandom (between this and the Who book, women really do seem to like slash fic a heck of a lot, don't they?). There are enough of both to keep the reader engaged, plus interviews with Buffy writer Jane Espenson and Drusilla's Juliet Landau. The writers are from diverse backgrounds (one of my favorite essays is from a minister, for example) and the multiple shows that could be tackled kept each essay pretty fresh. Well, except for the numerous instances of slash fic interest. Really, people. I won't ask WHY it's of import, because I feel like I read multiple essays on the subject, but I guess I'm too much of a guy in that respect.

Hyperion to a Satyr posts this week:
III.i. The Nunnery Scene - Branagh '96

Reign of the Supermen #390: New52 Super-Soldier

Source: Age of Amalgam (2011)
Type: Fan-made AmalgamPaul C saves another Amalgamonday by just coming up with an awesome New52 (or should that be New52.1?) Super-Soldier! Follow the link above to see all the fan reactions to the rebooted Amalgam Universe! I dare say, they may seem familiar.

Also relevant: Fearpoint!

Today, the Part of Steve Rogers Will Be Played by Neil Patrick Harris

Germaine to my current interests (from Amazing Spider-Man #673 by Dan Slott and Stefano Caselli).

Jumping-Off Points II: Jumping Out of Aircraft Obsessively, Continued

I said I'd come back to this and so I do. If the DC Relaunch is all about giving new readers jumping-on points, why all the jumping OFF imagery. Subliminally, all those people jumping our of aircraft is going to take its toll. After the first two weeks, DC had published seven comics with that image in them. The last two have added three more:

Comic: Batman: The Dark Knight #1Jump: Batman jumps dramatically out of his batplane at the beginning of the issue, not to fight crime, but to dress as Bruce Wayne in an alley and then swing up to a ballroom's balcony on a bat rope. Gratuitous AND stupid.

Comic: Blackhawks #1
Jump: During an attack on an airport, the Blackhawk known as Kunoichi first rips a guy out of his seat and into some suitcases before jumping off the crashing jet and into the water, slowing herself down with recoil from her "jackhammer" gun.

Comic: The Flash #1
Jump: Goons jump out of a VTOL plane and through a skylight, and one of them and the Flash later fall out of its back end during their escape.

That's 10 this month at DC, but to be fair, other comics publishers gave their readers similar jumping off points:

Comic: Captain America and Bucky #622
Jumps: First Namor, then Toro and Bucky jump out of an airplane to fight Nazi Antlanteans.

Comic: Super Dinosaur #4
Jump: Jets scramble to stop Maximum's aircraft from reach the Dynamo Dome, but the pilots have to bail when they find themselves outgunned.

Comic: Jurassic Park: Dangerous Games #1
Jump: The protagonist is thrown out of a helicopter into the swamps of Jurassic Park Island.

You know who DOESN'T bail out of a crashing plane this month?
Steve Austin, astronaut. A man barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world’s first bionic man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster.

5 Supervillains You Perhaps Didn't Know Were in the Movies

Hollywood's increasing output of superhero movies tends to generate the same kinds of discussions, consistently among them, "Who will be the villain?" Movie goers will recognize the names as well as the comic book fans - the Joker, the Green Goblin, the Red Skull, Bullseye... What many movie goers will not know however is that there are far more supervillains on the big screen than they think! These might be references "for the fans", or characters being groomed to show up later in the franchise, and might even escape the attention of actual comic book readers. Here then are five such characters and their shots at the big time...



The Lizard (Spider-Man 2 & 3)Following a mention in the first Spider-Man film, Peter Parker's one-armed teacher, Dr. Curt Connors, would make appearances in both sequels (played by Dylan Baker). In the comics, Dr. Connors created a regenerative agent that regrew his arm but turned him into the animalistic Lizard. This is his last chance to show up on this list because he's set to be the main antagonist in the Spider-Man reboot film in 2012, this time played by Welsh actor Rhys Ifans (Spike in Notting Hill). That's some pretty crazy casting...



Mr. Zsasz (Batman Begins)

The criminal being tried by Rachel Dawes and who later escapes during the Arkham break-out to threaten her (played by Tim Booth) is very much from the comics. In the film, he "butchers people for the mob". In the comics, Victor Zsasz is a serial killer than murders entire families and leaves them in lifelike poses. He marks each kill with a cut on his body. You'd think a non-costumed character like that would be a one-off, but he captured the readership's imagination and has made frequent appearances since.



The Floronic Man (Batman and Robin)

The scientist played by John Glover who gives Bane and Poison Ivy their powers in the terrible, terrible Batman&Robin, Jason Woodrue, started out life as a plant-inspired criminal in the pages of The Atom way back in 1962. In the 70s, he used a serum to mutate himself into a plant man during which time he faced the Flash and Green Lantern. He would later turn up in Alan Moore's Swamp Thing and even become a hero (as "Floro") as a member of the New Guardians. He fell off the wagon again in the 90s and has been a thorn in the side of various heroes, mostly Batman. It's amazing to me that in current continuity (well, for the next week anyway), Woodrue has been made responsible for Poison Ivy's creation. Because movies are more widely seen than comics, it's frequent that movie mythology is imposed on comics continuity. But Batman and Robin's? REALLY?!



Arnim Zola (Captain America: The First Avengers)

The most recent example of a comics villain hidden in plain sight is Arnim Zola, the Red Skull's scientific sidekick in the new Captain America movie (played by the Dream Lord himself, Toby Jones). This crazy-ass Jack Kirby creation from 1977 is a former Nazi with a synthetic body whose head is a camera and whose chest is a tv screen broadcasting his face. I doubt we'll ever see a "grown-up" version of Zola in the movies, but imagine if we did! (Arnim Zola also appears in the David Hasselhoff's Nick Fury Agent of SHIELD TV movie as a wheelchair-bound Dr. Strangelove wannabe.)



James Gordon Jr. (The Dark Knight)

A recent ark in Detective Comics has turned Commissioner Gordon's little boy, James Jr., seen in The Dark Knight being threatened by Two-Face, in the "Peter Pan Killer". Who knew that Two-Face would leave such a mark? In the comics, James is a heavily disturbed individual who has always had a lack of conscience and who may or may not have spiked Gotham's baby food to create natural born criminals in 20 years time. Nathan Gamble should return to the role when he's an adult in my imaginary Batgirl & Robin film.



Maybe you have other favorites? I'm also compiling a list of comics supervillains who showed up on tv. I'll let you know what I find.

Reign of the Supermen #285: Statesman

Source: City of Heroes MMORPG (2004)
Type: Analog/AmalgamWhen reader Dale Glaser wrote me to suggest Statesman from the City of Heroes computer game universe, I initially contested the character's role as a Superman analog. Sure, Superman has patriotic elements, but Statesman was really more of a Captain America, wasn't he? Well, Dale set me straight. What we have here is not a Superman analog, he's a Super-Patriot analog. And guess what day it is? That's right, Amalgamonday! When City of Heroes created its own superhero universe, it actually took from both major shared universes and came up with a team called the Freedom Phalanx for Your Own Heroes(TM) to look up to. And this Freedom Phalanx is filled with amalgams of Justice Leaguers/Avengers.

Stateman. for his part, is not an alien (Cap), but has the classic powers of flight, super-strength and invulnerability (Supes). He dresses in red and blue (both) with stars (Cap) and a cape (Supes), and was around during the Golden Age (both). Some of his old buddies call him "Captain", probably his rank when he was in the army (Cap). His love interest is an intrepid reporter (Supes). He doesn't carry a shield or get placed in suspended animation (Supes, or at least, not-Cap). And because team members often provide a context for determining an analog, the Freedom Phalanx is composed of Manticore (Green Arrow/Hawkeye), Synapse (Flash/Quicksilver), Positron (Iron Man/Green Lantern) and Sister Psyche (Wonder Woman/Scarlet Witch). They're not true amalgams (Sister Psyche's more of a Jean Gray actually, and Positron only has his look to tie him to those two characters), because they service the various game archetypes more than any amalgamation concept, but you can see it if you squint.

Statesman's dual inspiration may be seen in the fact he has two arch-nemeses, one for each aspect. The Reichsman is close to the Red Skull, while the Tyrant is akin to Earth-3's Ultraman.
So you decide. Statesman... Superman analog?

This Week in Geek (25-31/07/11)

Buys

Was intrigued by this Iceland/Norway production called The Bothersome Man, so I snagged it.

"Accomplishments"

In theaters: I was expecting Captain America and Bucky, but I wasn't expecting the Howling Commandos and the Human Torch android. I was expecting the Red Skull, but not Arnim Zola and Hydra. I certainly wasn't expecting a visual reference to the Cosmic Cube or a musical number. Not only is Cap a good superhero movie, but a war picture as well, and its got those extra layers for the knowledgeable comic book geek too. I was reminded throughout of how good the G.I. Joe movie might have been, because this is basically that, isn't it? A good G.I. Joe movie. And it's almost disappointing to leave World War II behind for Avengers and any possible sequel, because it really gave Captain America its own identity (which I believe is where the Marvel movies' success lies - Cap as Weird War II movie, Thor as fantasy, etc.). That, and it means we lose Tommy Lee Jones' Colonel Phillips!

DVDs: As far as watching movies at home goes, I went a little more realistic. Ridley Scott's Black Hawk Down recreates the battle of Mogadishu in Somalia, a powerful vision of urban warfare and a true event that changed U.S. policy for the better part of a decade. Many actual soldiers are collapsed into easier to follow characters, and the movie's made changes here and there, but it's essentially what happened. And it's exhausting, which I guess is the point. These soldiers were under unrelenting fire for 18 hours on a mission that should have taken a half hour. Ridley Scott says in the extras that he wanted to recreate the experience, not load the film with back story. He's certainly managed that, and there's no question his visual style fills every frame with something interesting. And if you're interested in recent military history, the DVD package has loads of extras. Three commentary tracks: Ridley Scott & Jerry Bruckheimer (the latter a little political for my tastes, by which I means I don't share his), the writers of both the book and the script, and some of the soldiers who lived through the event. These not only talk about how the film was made, but also sets the record straight where it needs to be. Disc 2 features about 3 hours of making of material from inception to reception, as well as deleted scenes, commented storyboards and pictures and an alternate opening sequence. And then there's Disc 3, which features two separate documentaries on the actual event made for tv (they don't use the same spokespeople nor cover the same ground, so they aren't redundant), a music video, three 10-minute edits of various Q&As, and commentary on a multi-angle sequence. At the risk of telling you too much about one event and film, so to speak, but I was always kept interested.

A big DVD meant I was also gonna watch a bunch of cheapies, with no real extras. It's my last week of vacation, I wanted to empty a bit of the unwatched shelf, you see. The first of these was The Accused, the film that made a star out of Jodie Foster, and this despite top credit going to... Kelly McGillis?! Who the heck? I'm kidding, we all remember her from Witness as well. McGillis plays a D.A. who takes up the case of a girl (Foster) who is gang raped, though because of her less than stellar reputation, is considered a sure loser. This too is based on an actual event, a landmark case from 1983, and it's got some pretty harrowing scenes of rape. McGillis is a bit "tv movie" for my tastes, but Foster is completely believable, at once damaged and sympathetic, and rightly won the Oscar and Golden Globe for Best Actress for it in 1988 (or '89, since they're given the next year).

Next up was an old favorite. The Color of Money is one of my favorite films of all time, and an underrated Scorsese picture if there ever was one. I'm not sure why, but this 25-years-later sequel to The Hustler (itself a fine, but completely different, film) moved with the cracking power of billiard balls. Check the film out again if you haven't in a while, and you'll see crash zooms and quick camera motions on the people as well as the balls. But at the heart of it, The Color of Money is about second chances. Paul Newman's character looks at first to buy himself one, but discovers he would rather earn it. And Tom Cruise is at a point in his career when his trademark energy seemed appropriate. Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio has never been sexier (only slightly because it's the first time I've seen it with nudity). And there's a scene with a young Forest Whitaker that I quote to someone probably once a year. Revisiting it this week, I didn't find it lacking. I wish people paid it more attention.

Green Lantern: Emerald Knights is a sequel to the animated movie First Flight, with Nathan Filion in the lead (voice) role (and come on, he'd make a great Hal Jordan). The main story is that of Krona coming to eradicate Oa, just as Arisia (Elizabeth Moss) enters training. It's a fine excuse to tell many tales of the Green Lantern Corps through the movie, including those of the very first GL, of Kilowog's days as a rookie, of Mogo, and more. After three consecutive GL-related movies that feature versions of Hal's origin story, it's a breath of fresh air to see something else. Most of the stories used are adapted from the comics, some recent, but some as far back as the 80s. They seem fresh here, and the animation is certainly as sharp and action-filled as in any of the WB's releases. The WB continues its streak of Sneak Peaks at other stuff (most notably Batman: Year One), yet nothing on the feature at hand, not even a reprise of its own Sneak Peak. Ah well. Still, a good animated feature for Green Lantern fans.

I think I talked about Superman Returns enough today, so I'll stick to the DVD's special features, all on a second disc. There's a huge making of documentary that follows pre-production and shooting in detail and is quite fun. It never takes itself too seriously, and a lot of screen time is given over to the antics of Bryan Singer, James Marsden (that guy's just funny) and Kevin Spacey (no slouch either). It even ends with a blooper reel. In the inception stages, one might find just where the film went wrong, though it never detracts from the film's achievements. After you're done with those almost 3 hours of documentary, you'll still have 10 deleted scenes and a technical bit that shows how they recreated Marlon Brando's Jor-El for the film. The package as a whole enhances the viewing experience, which is what they're meant to do.

All through July, I've been comparing two versions of the same story each week. This time around, a bit of a change of pace because the two versions could not be more dissimilar, to the point of avoiding comparison altogether. Yes, I watched the first Batman film and the last (or latest, if you will), i.e. The Dark Knight. The Adam West original, filmed between seasons 1 and 2 of the 1960s show, is really all we have to pore over on DVD of that era, at least, until they untangle the rights to the tv show itself. Good thing it's a good example of it, then. Batman and Robin go up against their four greatest nemeses, Joker, Riddler, Penguin and Catwoman (and while I've often professed a preference for Julie Newmar's, Lee Merriweather's will do just fine, thank you) in what can only be termed an absurdist comedy. Batman is a send-up, but not a parody or spoof, which is a thin line to walk, and yet it does so admirably. From the moment that rubber shark takes hold of Batman's leg, you know you'll love this ride filled with flashy vehicles, bizarre detective conclusions and other silliness. The DVD includes a commentary track by Adam West and Burt Ward, but they basically have a good time watching the movie with you. They mention all the best stories in the 15-minute featurette anyway, and more besides. There's also a bit with the Batmobile's designer who has plenty of stories to tell, and a load of behind the scenes pictures.

I spilled a lot of virtual ink about The Dark Knight when it came out (I think everyone did), and I sure don't want to repeat myself. Of course, I wrote about the film after seeing it once on the big screen. Seeing it again, I'm chuffed that bits I'd completely forgotten support my thesis about the film's theme. To me, The Dark Knight has a thematic richness that far outreaches its action sequences. Watch your ears. On my tv, at least, the action BOOMED while the dialog was mixed in much lower. The DVD extras are a mixed bag (isn't this one of those DVDs where they purposely tried to get you to switch to Blu-Ray?) in scope if not in quality. There's an excellent 6-minute piece on the film's music, an interesting 17 minutes more on the evolution of the suit, gadgets and vehicles, and some 45 minutes of entertaining "Gotham Tonight" fake news show webisodes leading up to the film's events. Less interesting are the IMAX sequences, which offer a taller format on action scenes. Not as relevant as discussion on the script or the film's villains, which are sadly missing from this edition.

Kung Fu Friday's selection was The Master AKA 3 Evil Masters, a very strange hybrid indeed. The story is a good one: A martial arts master is severely wounded in a fight with the dreaded "Three Devils" and finds refuge with the most junior student of a martial arts school. In exchange for his help, the master teaches the student a better form of kung fu, which he'll eventually need to defeat the Devils. It's got a well-constructed plot and stellar fight choreography. However, it's also an unforgivably broad comedy, and some of the clowning will definitely turn Western audiences off. And the music sure doesn't help, a collection of cartoon sound effects and intrusive stock music. I say watch it for the action (it's awesome), and grit your teeth when it's trying to be funny. Maybe one to see with a large group of hecklers, it'll make you feel less guilty. The DVD has some photos and trailers, but its main attraction is an 8-minute interview with the Master himself, Chen Kuan Tai, who talks about the film and about his lawsuit with Shaw Brothers.

Audios: Continuing my journey through Doctor Who's lost episodes, I listened to Galaxy 4 this week, a somewhat dull science fiction story starring the 1st Doctor, Vicki and Steven. Nominally about not judging a book by its cover, it's also got space amazons with an intriguing culture and a bunch of bleeping robots who, on audio, bleep a heck of a lot indeed. Long stretches of bleeping. It's meant to be charming, but it's not quite R2-D2. The linking narration is the weakest I've yet heard in the first volume of the Lost Episode sets. It's written well enough, but Peter Purves (Steven) sounds like he has a cold and makes a lot of wet mouth noises. His delivery certainly lacks the tension other narrators (the gold standard for me is William Russell, but Carole Anne Ford is good too) have brought to this set. I'm afraid I'll be stuck with Purves until the end of volume 2, so I hope he picks up the pace a little bit.

New Unauthorized Doctor Who CCG cards: 23 new cards, mostly from A Christmas Carol, though some basic concepts from other places, like the Torchwood Hub, the Sonic Screwdriver and some Dalek cards. We're still a ways from making rudimentary decks to test the engine, but I'm trying to get enough key cards to make a test game possible. I'm confident what I learned in the past half dozen years will serve me well in this 2nd edition though.

Hyperion to a Satyr posts this week:
III.i. Briefings - Branagh '96

Reign of the Supermen #271: TV's Super-Soldier

Source: Amalgam Age of Comics blog (2010)
Type: Fan-made AmalgamAnother of PaulC's awesome Amalgams, it shows George Reeves as Super-Soldier, on a show we'll never see brought to us by Nestlogg's. Read the rest of the story HERE, and let Paul know how much you want to see Adam West as Dark Claw!

Reign of the Supermen #201: Cyborg Super-Soldier

Source: Amalgam Age of Comics
Type: Fan-made Amalgam"Following the tragic death of Super-Soldier at the hands of Doctor Doomsday two scientists named Simon and Harlan Westfield formed Project Cadmus-Mech with the sole aim of recreating the Super-Soldier..."

The rest of the Amalgam story at PaulC's awesome Age of Amalgam. Follow the link above. Great work as ever, and I'd love to read Reign of the Super-Soldiers for real.

Reign of the Supermen #131: Superman, Honorary Avenger

Source: JLA/Avengers #3-4 (2003)
Type: Crossover anomalyIn 2003, Kurt Busiek and George Perez did a better version of DC vs. Marvel, and in fact a better Crisis than any since (or possibly including) the first. JLA/Avengers is what a big crossover event should be like, and the fact that it's a cross-company crossover makes it all the more magical. It doesn't end in Amalgamation, but the Marvel and DC universes do co-exist at a dimensional intersection for a while (incredibly, Busiek makes this an awkward one-night stand between Eternity and Kismet), and Captain America lends Superman his shield. And then for a single page, Supes wields Thor's hammer and brings in the Power with a capital P.

I could probably write a while swathe of articles based on this project (which IS in continuity, since Krona's cosmic egg was seen again), but if I stick to Superman for now... Anyone else notice that Supes and Cap are the two who are best attuned to their home universes, to the point of becoming really edgy when in the wrong one? And since these guys are the oldest of each present, it makes perfect sense. Like Cap, most Marvel heroes are "ordinary men" (at least in some ways), lower powered but full of heart. They live in the real world of World War II and American politics. And like Superman, DC's heroes are bigger than life, epic in scope, and live in iconic cities that never were. Cornerstones both.

JLA/Avengers would be cool even if it only had the Perez artwork going for it. That is has a resonant story that pays tribute to both comic book worlds and what makes each one special... that's the proverbial cherry on top.

Reign of the Supermen #124: Composite Super-Soldier

Source: Amalgam Age of Comics blog (2010)
Type: Fan-made AmalgamHey! I forgot a Composite-Superman! This one's from PaulC's excellent Amalgam Age blog. He does such terrific work too!

From Amalgam Age: "Eddie Meach was a reporter for the Daily Planet who lost everything when his lies were exposed by Super-Soldier. He broke into the Super-Soldier Museum in the middle of the night in order to end his own life, but fate intervened! A bolt of lightning shot through an open window and struck a display of statues of the Legion of Galactic Guardians. The bolt passed through the statues and endowed Meach with the combined powers of the Legion! Meach decided to use his new found powers to seek revenge on Super-Soldier. He used his shapeshifting ability to form a new identity for himself, half Super-Soldier, half Dark Claw...THE COMPOSITE SUPER-SOLDIER!"

Please, give Paul some love by following the link above!

What If... Kraven the Hunter Had Killed Spider-Man?

Well, I can't say this comic is well put together much at all. Uneven art where every hero might as well be four feet tall is the least of its problems. Its structure is terrible, with an over-long epilogue filled with unmotivated happenings... Well, I'll let the comic speak for itself, I suppose.

What If vol.2 #17 (September 1990)
Based on: Web of Spider-Man #31-32
The true history: When Kraven the Hunter goes mad, he shoots Spider-Man with a tranq dart and buries him alive and takes his place, having eaten spiders and BECOME the spider. Eventually, Spider-Man escapes from his tomb while the disturbed Kraven, satisfied with his "last hunt" commits suicide.
Turning point: What if Kraven had shot Spider-Man with an actual bullet?
Story type: Slayer/New World Order
Watcher's mood: Fading in and out
Altered history: So Kraven kills Spider-Man before burying him (probably safer) as in the original story, goes out to lethally fight crime as a new Spider-Man, high on spider juice. The divergence occurs when Spider-Man is gone long enough for Mary Jane, who was about to move in with her husband, starts to panic. She assembles a crack team of super-heroes to check on the new, violent Spider-Man, letting on that her husband's disappearance in somehow connected, she just knows it.
The Torch (God rest his soul... no wait, I don't believe for a second he's dead, scratch that), Daredevil and Captain America each encounter Spider-Kraven, and they all come to the same conclusion. That's not Spider-Man! I'd even say they were a bit slow about it, especially since MJ sorta told them he was an impostor. It's been two weeks, and she's ready to spill the beans.
As in the original timeline, Vermin comes into the story and jumps J.J. Jameson. Spider-Kraven saves him by killing Vermin, though of course JJJ is sure he would have been next, if it wasn't for the interference of our three heroes. They follow Kraven to the graveyard, where the mad Hunter feels the need to eat of the spider directly!
They apprehend him before a Marvel comic would have had to show cannibalism (it was 20 years ago, we didn't realize how slippery the slope was) and find Peter Parker's body. Mary Jane cries for a page, then goes off to tell Aunt May who blows a fuse when MJ slanders her poor Peter by saying he was Spider-Man.
Then there's the quiet funeral, and you'd think that would be that. But no, it goes on. MJ and the heroes call a press conference where she reveals Peter was Spider-Man to clear his name of any of Spider-Kraven's wrong-doing. Even with Captain America RIGHT THERE, the press is all about calling the heroes' bullshit. Tabloid peddler JJJ says the real Spider-Man attacked him, so it must be true! And then of course, Jonah shows up on stage in crutches and there's a lame struggle with the Torch, which the press paints like THIS:
From there, super-heroes are investigated by Congress and public opinion turns against them. Even the Avengers and Fantastic Four quietly disband or go into hiding. Better not to fight this, says Reed Richards. ...WHAT?!? This would be completely ridiculous if not for the many real examples of this kind of behavior from the media and its consumers. Wait, it's still not over... MJ goes on to be a crusader, dedicating her life to removing the stain from her husband's name and that of all the heroes he brought down with him. Oh, and I'm pretty sure the Marvel Universe is overrun with villains inside of a week.
Books canceled as a result: Only the Spider-Man titles, really, and maybe the Avengers. Everyone else can operate under the radar, affecting the Marvel Universe's "secret history", or operating in the face of public outrage. The X-Men have been doing it for years.
These things happen: Recently, Kraven was brought back from the dead for a "Grim Hunt" (which got its own What If? special) in a ceremony requiring his family to murder Kane, one of Spider-Man's clones and a dead ringer for Peter Parker. Well, they thought he was the real deal so... close enough.

Next week: What if the Fantastic Four Battled Dr. Doom Before They Got Their Powers?
My guess: Doom does not suffer the indignity of being tied up with Reed Richards' bendy torso.

What If... Steve Rogers Had Refused to Give Up Being Captain America?

No, not recently when he came back from the dead, but back in the late 80s when the mantle was given over to a government stooge and he took on the mantle of simply "the Captain". Jim Valentino offers up the first of many What If? scripts volume 2, a series he'll also draw on occasion before leaving to found Image with his angsty buddies.

What If vol.2 #3 (September 1989)
Based on: Captain America v.1 #332
The true history: A secret government commission manipulated by the Red Skull invoked the U.S. government's copyright on "Captain America" and ordered Steve Rogers to become its tool. Rogers refused, handed over the trademarked costume and shield, and became the Captain, leaving the Cap identity to the former Super-Patriot, John Walker.
Turning point: What If Steve Rogers had refused to give up being Captain America?
Story type: Slayer
Watcher's mood: Thumb-wounded
Altered history: In this reality, Steve Rogers decides not to even relinquish the suit, claiming that "Captain America" should be free from government influence. The Commission brands him a fugitive and soon sends Freedom Force (i.e. the old Brotherhood of Evil Mutants - oh 80s Republican America, you make me laugh so!) to harass the Avengers.
But Cap has quit to protect his teammates, so they get nowhere. Meanwhile, the Commission's training of a replacement Cap proceeds apace. Rick Jones and other Cap supporters go on tv to change public opinion, but it looks to me like public opinion was already on Cap's side.
The next day's rally turns out to be a huge mistake (somebody somewhere doesn't know what "fugitive" means, I guess). The Commission's stooges, Super-Patriot and his Buckies, attack Cap and his allies in broad daylight to bring him to justice. The fight is stopped by Nick Fury who's brought a little friend: RONALD REAGAN!
Before Obama came on the scene, Reagan was probably the most comics-appearance president in history, and here he was to sort it all out. He pardons Steve Rogers and allows him to represent American ideals, while Super-Patriot can see to the government's foreign and domestic affairs. But the Red Skull will have none of it. He panics and orders Cap's death right there on the stage, and martyrdom be damned!
The Skull's senatorial pawn gets all shot up by SHIELD for his trouble, and Reagan immediately asks Super-Patriot John Walker to become the next Captain America. As in our world, so in theirs: John Walker goes over the edge, giving in to roid rage and dishonoring the uniform. And without the Captain lurking in the pages of the comic, he really does go too far, pummeling baddies to death.
He is forced to retire, and in the monument erected to honor the real Captain America, the Red Skull laughs. He's finally won.
Books canceled as a result: Though Captain America has proven to be a pretty unstoppable title, it looks like it wouldn't have bounced back from the John Walker days chronicled in this alternate reality.
These things happen: As we know, Captain America did get assassinated (but he got better). As for refusing to give up the mantle, he recently had the chance and didn't. Looks like Steve Rogers is a bigger hero than "Captain America" is.

Next week: What if the Alien Costumed Had Possessed Spider-Man?
My guess: Lots of dancing.